At first I was very excited about my wife going to the N’shei (even if it meant babysitting). I came home that day to the smell of delicious cake and hurried excitedly towards the kitchen, opened the oven to take a peek inside and was quickly warned that the cake was only and exclusively for the N’shei event that evening. Bummer. Well, it’s okay I thought, because there are probably going to be another twenty women baking for this event and my wife is gonna come home with a smorgasbord full of treats! And then she came home empty-handed. The ensuing conversation went something like this:
“Where are the goods?”
“Sorry, I couldn’t bring anything home for you.”
“Why not, did you guys finish everything?”
“Oh, no way, hardly anyone touched anything. It was all so fattening — we wouldn’t go near that stuff.”
“So what’s the problem?”
“I can’t walk out of there with a tray full of cake and cookies for you, it’s so embarrassing!”
Very, very disappointing. She wouldn’t even hear my idea of slipping some into her pocketbook, I mean, come on! That thing is like a bottomless pit — it fits everything! Do they have a cake detector at the exit so no one sneaks anything out? Nothing could budge her.
And then it hit me, Isheis! That’s right N’sheis for men. Why should they be the only ones able to hang out with their friends once a month? The wives could bake for us and I could get a comedian to perform for us (I know a really funny guy). Pure genius. But for some reason not everyone saw the genius of my plan. First, the friends I called about the idea grumbled something about it being really weird and hung up. Then I didn’t get any phone calls in response to the signs I hung up around the neighborhood. What clinched it was that my wife (and according to her, everyone else’s wife) was not willing to bake for my Ishei. Back to the drawing board.
Finally I came up with my master plan. Host the N’shei by our place!! Perfect. First of all, I won’t be able to babysit since I have to leave the house because all these women are coming over. Second, all of them will bring their baked goods straight into my house and after no one eats them I will be left with enough cake to indulge to my heart’s desire!
I promptly told my wife that I think it would be a great idea to host the next N’shei by us, and I would even be willing to help clean and set up for the event. My wife was very touched that I was willing to be so supportive of her N’shei. (This plan just kept getting better and better.) And then I got the phone call…
“Who do you think you are?” the man asked in an annoyed tone.
“I’m sorry, who is this?”
“This is the husband of the woman who always hosts the N’shei. How dare you try to take over the N’shei, those cakes are mine!”
Wow, I had not expected that. But we spoke it out and I convinced him that I meant no harm, and hadn’t realized he had already staked claims to the N’shei. We came to an agreement that if I stay out of it and don’t contest his rights to host the event, I can come over after and take one slice from each cake.
Well, that was a lot of hard work and in the end I definitely came out with some spoils for my effort, but I must admit that I still have my heart set on one day hosting the very first Ishei event.